Cultural Politics
by MindAboveMadness
Summary: 10. A country has two personifications, one for the culture of the country, and one for the government. While two types of personifications interact plenty with their own group and their other counterpart, the two groups don't interact much. Well, America's always been one for change. (Male and Female national counterparts.)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I hope you enjoy my new Heta story! I will be using human names for reasons to be revealed in later chapters!**

 **Update: I was getting repeated reviews about the lyrics in the chapter (only one of them was phrased kindly) and so I had to remove them due to a copyright rule I accidentally overlooked. The lyrics from the ringtone are from the song "Right Hand Man" from the musical "Something Rotten".**

The world meeting was completely and absolutely unordinary. Matthew Williams, the economic and political representative of Canada, sat bored in his seat, doodling on a piece of paper. The phone in his pocket buzzed and he paused, looking up to see that Austria was presenting. Knowing that the musically inclined nation wouldn't notice or care that he's not paying attention. Thanking his invisibility, Matthew pulls out his phone, checking the text message. The contact is labeled "Miss Melting Pot" and Matthew smiles at the text.

" _Before Alfie presents, nick his phone, would you? Text me when he goes up and then slide his phone into the middle of the table, make sure the ringer is on. Please and thanks xx"_

Matthew smiles at his sister's idea, and mentally resolves to comply. Whatever the cultural representation of America is planning, it's nothing more than a harmless prank. She probably changed Alfred's ring tone to 'Barbie Girl' or the Dora the Explorer theme song or something equally embarrassing again.

After reading over the itinerary for the meeting, Matthew notes that Alfred is after Matthew himself, who is after Francis. Realizing that they have a few people in front of them, Matthew decides to sneak Alfred's phone during Francis's presentation.

* * *

"Good luck," Matthew says to Alfred as he passes his brother on his way back to his seat, Alfred's phone in his pocket.

"Thanks," the American smiles as he stands.

" _He's going"_

Matthew texts Alfred's cultural counterpart. As Alfred draws all attention towards him, Matthew sends the American's phone sliding to the middle of the table. The phone begins to buzz and a ringtone starts to play.

—

"Oh no," Alfred says as the verses play.

—

"Is there something you want to say, America?" Arthur asks in amusement. If a nation's phone goes off and it's not their boss, the nation has to answer on speakerphone.

—

"Honhonhon, something you should tell us Amérique?" Francis asks in amusement as America grips the podium tight, eyeing the phone warily.

—

"Okay, I'm getting tired of this," Gilbert complains, getting up and onto the table to reach for the phone. "Kesesese, America! Who's 'Miss America'?" He reads off the contact name with a suggestive smirk.

"Fusososo," Antonio laughs, catching on. "Something you want to tell us?"

"Oh for the the love of Superman, give me the phone!" Alfred decides, consequences be damned.

"If you say so~" Gilbert winks, tossing the phone to his friend, who accepts the call and puts it on speaker.

"You're on speaker, Amie," Alfred warns the caller.

"Good," a female voice answers that makes Matthew groan and put his head in his hands. "But I'm not Amie. She wants you to open up Skype for your presentation, she's made a few changes."

"And if I don't?" Alfred challenges the not-Amie.

"Just remember how much blackmail the three on us have on the three of you~" Juan (Mexico), Alfred, and Matthew all go pale.

"You said Skype, right?" Alfred says, setting the phone down on the podium and going to his computer.

"Yep~! See you in a bit!" The voice says cheerily before ending the call.

"You don't mind, do you Germany?" Alfred asks as he's in the middle of setting up Skype.

"Not at all," Ludwig replies, amused to see how this will play out.

 **A/N: It's** **a bit of a short chapter, I'll admit, but I hope it's satisfying enough for now!**


	2. The Bathroom

**Chapter 2 - The Bathroom**

Elsewhere, in a bathroom.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Madeline, the cultural personification of Canada asks her sister, who is currently in the shower.

"It's not like they can see me," Amelia shrugs behind the curtain. "Plus, I thought that I would have enough time."

"You do know that this is going to be on display in front of half of the entire world," Maria, Mexico's cultural personification, reminds Amelia.

"Yep!" Amelia grins as the Skype call begins.

"Hey- Amelia are you kidding me?" Alfred's voice is heard. "You're seriously doing a Skype call in front of the whole world in the shower?"

"It's only half of the world, little brother," Amelia reminds her brother cheekily.

"I can't believe you," he says simply.

"Love you too, anyway, down to business," Amelia says. "It's come to several of our attentions that the cultural and political personifications don't interact much. Sure, we interact if we're representatives of the same country, or if we're the same type of representative, but other than that, we don't. That, plus it seems that our political counterparts are really good at making fools of themselves."

"Typical politicians," Maria comments with a snort.

"For one," Amelia continues. "Alfred, a burger-obsessed airhead? Really? Where's the military strategist that helped lead the Union to victory? Or the scientist that engineered the atom bomb?"

Back in the meeting room, Alfred flushes and runs the back of his neck, but he doesn't speak, knowing it's best to let his sister run her course.

"And Matthew!" The Canadian accent of the girl on the phone earlier speaks up. "Invisible? Really? And you let Ivan of all people sit on you? I mean, Anya sits on me all the time but that's for a completely different reason. Well, unless you like it when he sits on you." Madeline comments cheekily.

"Madeline!" Matthew cries, face flushed at what his sister is insinuating.

"Well, have you seen him?" Amelia speaks up. "I mean, damn. If I was into politicians, and not already taken by Sakura, I'd tap that."

"Amelia, one: you're a flaming lesbian," Alfred counters, seemingly not caring that this is a world meeting. "And two, get back to your point."

"Shut up, Gaylord," Amelia replies with a laugh. "Anyway, he's right, back on track." The sound of running water turns off and the camera is flipped to show the ceiling of the room.

"Matthew, buddy, Maddie has a point. Invisible? I know Canada in general doesn't stand out too much but at home you're anything but invisible. Even in our world meetings Maddie isn't invisible, through that might be because she's sitting on Anya and the two are talking about hockey. Do you know how many impromptu hockey games have occurred during your meetings with those two, the Nordics, and I?"

"Amelia," Maria warns her sister.

"Right. Cut it with the extreme pacifism and assert yourself damnit." The camera is flipped again to show Amelia in a forest green crop-top and short dark blue jean shorts.

"Anyway, the purpose of this call is to tell you that, in an hour, there's going to be a series of meetings between groups of both country personifications. Each group will have thirty people, or two reps from fifteen countries. For example, the G8, Romano, China, Prussia, Mexico, Belarus, Hungary, and Spain will be in one meeting. You'll get a text from your counterpart in half an hour with the room number of your group's meeting room. Got it? Okay good."

"And who put you in charge?" Carlos (Cuba) challenges from his seat. Amelia just laughs.

"As the Melting Pot, I'm the mediator and often the organizer of our meetings. You of all people should know that, Carlos. How many times do I have to put up with all of your shit at the Big House?"

Carlos mutters something unintelligent and sits down with a pout. The countries of the North American continent get together for a while once a month for "continental bonding" as a couple of them call it.

"America? A mediator? Don't make me laugh," Arthur comments in amusement. "Cultural or political, America is still an unorganized mess of a country. It's a wonder how it's still standing, seeing as it has no culture."

On the screen, Amelia's face turns from confident to hurt in seconds. Sure, she's heard it all before, even from her own people, but this is different. When her and Alfred's people say that America has no defined culture, it's just that they don't see it because they live the culture every day. Plus, they take pride in the fact that America is a melting pot of people and culture. But this, this blatant dismissal of Amelia's existence by another country is different. It hurts, despite how small the comment may seem.

"Okay, that's enough," Alfred says, facing Arthur. "Call me whatever you want, mock me for the face I show you, go ahead, that's what it's there for. But don't say a word against my sister or our people. Just because our country doesn't have a conventional culture, doesn't mean that it has no culture at all."

Inspired by her brother's defense of her, Amelia smiles and picks up the torch, so to speak.

"While America may not have a conventional culture, we do have one. As a land of immigrants, we take what culture the immigrants bring with them and then adapt it. We make it our own. By the way, Arthur, thanks for convincing your people to turn away Seamus's (Ireland)* way back when. I really profited from that!"

"Anyway," Madeline takes the camera from Amelia. "You have a bit less than an hour now until the meetings. Attend them because we need to get things done."

"And if we don't?" Alfred challenges.

"Just remember how much blackmail we have on you. That goes for all of you countries." Amelia's voice is heard, but Madeline stays silent. Instead, a creepy aura surrounds the northern personification, one that only appears while she's playing hockey and has a score to settle.

"Right," Alfred says with a nervous squeak in his voice.

"See y'all later!" Amelia waves from over Madeline's shoulder and the call ends.

 ***Long story short, back in the 1800's Ireland had a huge famine and millions of people left the country. The English at the time didn't like the Irish and turned them away. Large numbers of Irishmen and women immigrated to America. It wasn't all sunshine and rainbow at first because the Americans didn't like the Irish all the much at first either, but then we grew to love the little leprechauns! (Don't kill me for the joke pls. I too am part leprechaun.)**


	3. The Meeting

**Chapter 3 - The Meeting**

 **A/N: All nyotalia names are not mine, I got them off of Deviantart.**

 **Something else I'd like to add before we start: I headcanon that the Culturals are the older sibling of their Political counterpart. After all, the culture is what makes a country, the government is what sustains it.**

"And I thought that you had no filter mon ami," Francis says to Alfred after the call ends.

"Oh yeah, she just bounces from topic to topic. If you think I have bad ADD," Alfred whistles then laughs. "You ain't seen nothin' yet."

"Do we have to do this aru?" Yao complains.

"It all depends, do you want your cultural counterpart releasing heavily embarrassing information out into the world for all to see? 'Cause I sure as hell don't," Juan answers, shuddering at the amount of blackmail his sister has on him.

An hour later, Arthur, Francis, Matthew, Alfred, Juan, Elizabeta, Gilbert, Ludwig, Feliciano, Lovino, Antonio, Ivan, Natalya, Yao, and Kiku are in conference room 252. They sit in the order listed, Ludwig in the middle and Arthur and Kiku at the ends of the large table. After a minute or two, their counterparts all walk in, laughing and talking. They sit to occupy the empty side of the table in the following order:

Maria, Isabella, Chiara, Feliciana, Monika, Anya, Madeline, Amelia, Sakura, Chun-Yan, Alice, Francine, Daniel, Julchen, and Nikolai. (Or, they nyo versions of Mexico, Spain, Romano, Veneziano, Germany, Russia, Canada, America, Japan, China, England, France, Hungary, Prussia, and Belarus.)

The political personifications seem surprised at not only the seating arrangement, but at the obvious couples within their cultural counterparts. Feliciana and Monika are holding hands, Madeline foregoes her seat to sit on Anya's lap, Julchen is leaning on Daniel and is pressing the occasional kiss to his collarbone, and Amelia is looking at Sakura with such adoration that some could call it sickening.

Amelia looks away from Sakura as they end their conversation to focus on Ludwig. She stands, holding her hand out to the German across the table. Ludwig stands as well, grasping her outreached hand. They shake hands as Amelia introduces herself, even though she knows he saw her over the Skype call earlier.

"Amelia Jones, America."

"Ludwig Beilschmidt, Germany."

"It's nice to officially meet you," Amelia says after releasing his hand and sitting down.

"Likewise," Ludwig says, so as to not be rude.

"It may not have been clear over the call, but the goal of this meeting and the others like it is to integrate the two types of personifications. Almost everything we do, we do it separately. While that may seem better for your jobs, it can actually be harmful. You all know each other politically. You've formed alliances and friendships from international trading and during wars. Other than that, unless you were raised by, raised with, or live near another country, you all treat each other as colleagues, not friends." Amelia opens with the small speech.

"All due respect, Ms America, why would friendships benefit us more than political alliances like the ones we currently have?" Ludwig asks, seeing many of his fellow political representatives agree with his statement.

"It's something you Politicals don't seem to understand," Amelia says with a small smile. "We many not be humans, but we are like them. We have feelings, and more often than not, we crave to be with someone. Like humans, we crave relationships, romantic or platonic. We Culturals understand that, especially since it's a part of who we are." Amelia motions to Feliciana and Monika, Madeline and Anya, herself and Sakura, and Daniel and Julchen.

"Unlike you all, we act on our feelings rather than pushing them down and ignoring them for the sake of political relations."

"But as political personifications, it's our job to maintain political relations," Ludwig argues.

"But you're not just a political personification," Madeline argues from Anya's lap. "You can have friends and relations outside of political reasons. Of course, your country's political ties are going to influence your interactions with another country, especially if tensions are high. They're no way around that. But, that doesn't that you can't have non-political relations with someone."

"Exactly, thanks sis," Amelia sends a Hollywood smile towards her sister, who smiles back.

"No problem."

"Ms America, earlier you mentioned that keeping interactions between our groups separate may be more harmful for our jobs than we think, would you care to elaborate?" Ludwig prompts, changing the subject.

"Gladly," Amelia replies. "But I have a point to make first. Most of you Politicals tend to avoid Ivan, except for Feliciano who will make friends with anyone. While you may interact with Ivan, most of you are frightened by him to some degree. Anya, would you like to take it from here?" Amelia asks, turning to her sister's girlfriend.

"Da," Anya answers. Madeline moves off of Anya's lap so Anya can stand. "Even as child, Ivan was not good at making friends. When we were young, many countries wanted our land, and would attack us. As we grew, my brother would have many cruel bosses. To be blunt, it was not good for his mind.

"Later bosses tried to have him make friends, especially during the Soviet Union when many of us were living in the same house. But to others, my brother appeared to be cruel and mean, even though he is really not. When it comes to interacting with people, he is like child.

"He doesn't understand that he is hurting or scaring others. And then he comes home and he cries because it makes him sad. He doesn't understand why no one wants to be friends with him." Anya, instead of going to sit down, goes over to Ivan, who is silently crying.

{It's okay little brother,} she says to him in Russian, wiping his tears. {They know now, and soon you'll have many friends, I promise.} She kisses his head before returning back to her seat.

"See?" Amelia says pointedly. "Exhibit A. All of us Culturals, we befriended Anya and helped her long ago. But you guys? You abandoned Ivan and left him to his own devices. And because he's a political representative, Anya couldn't help him much. You see Ivan as a cruel man who enjoys the pain of others, but really, he's just a child who doesn't understand that it's not always a game."

Many of the Politicals are quiet, some look ashamed.

"I'm sorry," Yao is the first to speak. "I should have helped you as a child, aru. I was close enough, and I knew Kievan Rus, your mother before she faded. I should have at least checked on you and your siblings."

Ivan smiles sadly. "Being alone is not fun. Russian winters are cold and long, but those who are used to the cold north never visit."

"Come down to China aru," Yao suggests.

"Da, maybe I will," Russia smiles again, happier.

"See?" Amelia says to the other countries.

"While this answers the question of how expanding relations within our own group is beneficial, it doesn't explain how intermingling between the two groups will help us." Ludwig comments.

 **A/N: Earlier in the chapter I listed of some Nyo ships that are canon to my story. (Nyo!GerIta, Nyo!RusCan, Nyo!AmeriPan, and Nyo!PruHun.) I would like your guys' help in choosing non-Nyo ships. There's two conditions though.**

 **1) They can't be the same ships as the Nyo ships. (Maybe Gerita, but I want to try another pairing.)**

 **2) No Franada, UsUk, AmeCan, or RusBel (I will take FrUk, PruCan, AmeBel, or RusAme though.)**

 **You can also suggest Nyo pairings as well for unpaired characters. The poll for voting is on my profile, and if you want a ship that isn't portrayed, PM me, and I'll add it. There's a max of 10 Nyotalia ships and 15 Hetalia ships. Ships that don't get any votes or an addition vote within a week will probably be eliminated. I'd youve already voted via review, please go and vote on my profile.**


	4. The Question

"True" Amelia says. "I guess that didn't answer that question. But, you can't say that it was a waste of time."

"I never sa-" Alfred cuts Ludwig off.

"Dude," Alfred makes a 'cut it out' motion with his hand, waving it horizontally in front of his neck and shaking his head.

"Anyway, to answer your question," Amelia continues. "We need to intermingle to be able to interact properly. How many misunderstanding have occurred, especially in meetings, due to cultural misunderstandings? Every country has their own culture, hence why my friends and I exist."

"Most would think that us, the cultural group would fight more often," Nikolai speaks up. "But we don't. It's mostly because of Amelia, actually."

"Yep!" Feliciana agrees. "Ever since she's come into the picture, her and Madeline have been the peacekeepers."

"Ja," Monika nods. "Amelia is called the Melting Pot because she incorporates the cultures of all of her immigrants into her culture, meaning she has bits and pieces of all of our cultures in hers."

"Unlike most countries that have separate sub cultures, I'm a mix of many cultures," Amelia states proudly. "Sure, not all of my citizens have the same culture, but that's what makes it great! I know things about pretty much every culture in the world because of all of my citizens, so I'm naturally the mediator and the leader of the group."

"Because we actually stop and work out problems out," Alice speaks up. "We don't have arguments and fights like you guys do. And when we do, we work them out because more often then not, they're just cultural mix-ups that can easily be solved with communication." There's an obvious undertone of 'We're the superior group', in Alice's tone, but no one comments on it.

"Oui," Francine agrees. "And wouldn't it be nice for you all to actually get something done during a meeting?"

Several of the political countries catch themselves nodding in agreement. It would be nice to not have fights continually break out during the meetings. Even if the fights aren't always caused by cultural confusion, they can still use the same method to solve their problems - communication. Their group severely lacks the ability to communicate with others productively. It's a bit ironic, to be honest.

"So what if we could use communication?" Lovino speaks up. "That doesn't answer the jerk's question. Why would Culturals and Politicals working together benefit us? We work just fine separately."

"That's the thing fratello!" Chiara argues. "We work separate, representing our countries as separate entities. We don't need to!"

"He has a point though," Elizabeta points out. "Why should the government work with the culture?"

"Because without the culture, the government wouldn't be the same," Sakura points out. "The culture of the people influences how the government functions. Different forms of government don't work in different countries because of the culture and ideals of the people."

"Exactly!" Amelia agrees with her girlfriend. "There's a reason America isn't a monarchy! It's not in the ideals of our people, if you tried to make America a monarchy, you'd fail."

"Okay, yes, governmental structures have roots with a country's culture, but that's all. A government isn't influenced directly by a country's culture." Arthur argues, making several of the cultural personifications sigh and even a few put their heads in their hands in frustration.

"America, Canada, Mexico," Ludwig speaks up. "You three have been quiet, any thoughts?" The North American Brothers shake their heads 'no' violently.

"Oui, chers, something to add?" Madeline asks, turning to stare at Matthew.

"Yes, brothers dear, don't you have anything to say?" Amelia purrs, her voice sickly sweet.

"Sí hermanos, surely something is on your minds," Maria turns to her brother as well. To the shock (and amusement) of their political companions, Alfred, Matthew, and Juan actually look scared of their sisters.

There's a strained silence as the North American brothers don't reply, searching for the right thing to say.

"Why do all relations have to be purely for political benefit?" Alfred asks, finally thinking of something to say. "Like they said, we may be nations, but we're more like humans than we think. Can't we have friends just to have friends?"

"Plus," Matthew speaks up, surprising many Politicals who still forget about him. "Having the Culturals in our meetings could help keep the peace. They get along better than we do, and their neutral atmosphere might influence the atmosphere of our meetings to be a little calmer."

"Sí," Juan agrees. "And some political problems, issues, or controversies that cause fights in your meetings are because of cultural differences."

"And some are because of idiot politicians," Alice mutters.


	5. Author's Note: IMPORTANT, please read

**Before I go to the story (I know this is long, I'm sorry) I have to address a couple things that reviewers have mentioned.**

 **A) Yes, I know that Nyo!Italy and Nyo!England's names are incorrect, but I only found that out recently and I'm not planning on changing them.**

 **B) Yes, I've heard that, irl, the country of Italy is currently upset/pissed with the EU. If I do choose to portray this, it's only going to be with regular Italy, not Nyo!Italy. However, this may not be very likely as I don't care much for politics and if I'm going into something like this, I'm going to end up doing a shit-ton of research. If that happens, the whole story will get de-railed and end up being about how Feliciano is pissed off at people.**

 **C) Going off of irl relations, I received a message a while ago recommending ships based off of irl relations. I might end up using some of them as I was given reasoning based in irl political relations. So, sorry if you don't get your ship for the political nations.**

 **D) Sorry to GerIta shippers, but this story will have GerAnce for the political ship. I mean, I can't resist it. According to the EU, France and Germany are married and imagining those two as a couple is just too amusing, I can't pass it up!**

 **E) Please go and vote on my profile for ships! Some political ships that don't make the cut may end up as cultural ships so please do vote!**

 **Thanks for reading through this, the next chapter will be up within the week!**


	6. The Arguement?

**Chapter 5 - The Arguement...?**

 **A/N: So there's some comments about a(nother) political slip-up by none other than President Donald Trump, but it's not one of those big controversial things where there are two sides arguing, it's just my country's president being an idiot.**

This is the most political that this story is going to get. I don't like politics and I don't pay much attention to them.

"Is that a barb at my president?" Amelia asks, leaning back to look Alice squarely in the eyes.

"And if it is?" Alice asks, returning Amelia's stare.

"Then I'd have to agree with you," Amelia says with a laugh, echoed by Alfred.

"I'm surprised he hasn't ran us into the ground yet. And what was he thinking?" A few countries seem to be confused as to what Amelia, Alfred, and Alice are talking about. "Sorry about him, by the way Iggy," Alfred apologizes.

"You should be," Arthur says bluntly. "Honestly, walking in front of the Queen? Cutting her off? Shouldn't it be common sense not to walk in ahead of not only royalty, but someone 20 years your senior?"

Alfred and Amelia put their heads in their hands nearly at the same time before groaning. "I'm sorry" they say in unison.

"This again aru?" Chun-Yan asks tiredly.

"Ja, this is all you talked about last meeting," Julchen agrees.

"He walked in front of the Queen and cut her off!" Madeline points out. "You just don't do that!"

"Save your anger for the next Commonwealth meeting, we don't want to hear about it anymore!" Chiara complains, annoyed.

"If our next World Meeting is the Commonwealths bitching about America's president, I'm going to shoot someone," Juan announces.

"England," Ludwig addresses Arthur. "Please keep your children under control next meeting."

"They're not my-"

Alice cuts her brother off. "They kind of are."

"Like you don't count any of the Culturals as your kids!" Arthur shoots back.

"Well of course I do, I just don't have over 50 countries calling me a parental title."

"Back in our colony days you did," Amelia points out.

"They don't all call me their father!" Arthur argues, ignoring Amelia's comment.

"Sure about that?" Madeline and Matthew mutter.

"Yes!" Arthur protests, having heard Matthew since only Francis sat between the two.

"All of the Realms do!" Madeline calls down the table.

"They all must have some sort of attachment to you Arthur, they've all called you 'dad' or 'uncle' numerous times," Alice reminds them.

"As if they and their Culturals don't call you 'mum' or 'aunt'!"

"At least I don't deny it!" Alice shoots back.

"Okay!" Amelia shouts, standing. "Alice, Arthur, that's enough now! You can settle this later!"

The two personifications of England quiet.

"Sorry poppet," Alice apologizes as Amelia sits back down. Amelia flashes her mother-figure a smile in response.

"Thank you, Ms America," Ludwig says, visibly relaxing.

"No problem Ludwig." There's a moment of silence as no one speaks.

"If I may," Elizabeta speaks up, breaking the silence. "I think having our cultural counterparts with us at the meetings will help. They may provide useful insight that we may not have. Plus, it might save Prussia from a frying pan or two." At that, she gives Gilbert a teasing side-glance.

The albino ex-nation grins at the Hungarian as Germany speaks.

"Does anyone have a valid reason as to not include our counterparts in the next meeting?" There's silence as none of the political countries raise their hands. "Then I think we can call this meeting to an end."

 **A/N: Sorry that the chapter's so short! I've had it in my docs for a long while because I didn't know how to finish it so I settled for this. I'm sure that the next chapter will be longer.**

 **Speaking of length: This story most likely won't get much longer then 10 chapters, 15 at the max. Ships won't play a big part in the story, but I want to see what I can include.**

 **Speaking of ships: here are the final results! The highest voted for Political ships were PruCan, GerAnce, and RoMerica so they're the winners! There will be a chapter dedicated just for the ships btw, at the very end of the story.**

 **Final notice (god, this is so long, sorry!): school starts in a week for me. That, plus a bit of writer's block means that updates will be (even less) frequent as chapters will take longer to write. Stick with me though, I'm not abandoning anything!**


End file.
